Inbox Messages
by PeaceLoveandClarinets
Summary: Not a very original title but for my first fic I decided to do one of those Inbox ones. Inspired by Mathematicas "Inbox"
1. Anakin Skywalker

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Star Wars universe and am not making any money off of this so please don't sue me!**

_You reached Anakin Skywalker otherwise known as the Hero with no Fear or the Chosen One. I am not avaible to take your call because I'm either arguing with my old master about somthing pointless, being a "bad influence" on my padawan or fighting separatists. I will get back to you as soon as possible but it might be awhile since I never check this thing anyway. Oh and if you calling to complain about the billionth lightsaber I lost... What did you say Obi-Wan; you found it? Oh good! Wait is this still-_

_-beep-_

Master I can't believe you lost your lightsaber AGAIN! What am I going to do with you...

_-beep- _

Disappointed I am. Taught him better you should have Obi-Wan...

_-beep- _

Skywalker this is Windu did you have anything to do with my missing speeder?

_-beep- _

Anakin what did you do with Mace's speeder... He going to find out sometime you know! Oh and the things I tell you that we argue about are not pointless... they are usually very important things that you deem pointless!

_-beep- _

Master why didn't you let me help steal Master Windu's speeder? That would have been fun! Your not a bad influence though... you just know how to have fun!

_-beep- _

Oh Ani where are you it's been like three hours! Also why am I not mentioned in this recording? You would think after being married for two years I would at least get mentioned in this recording but _NO_!

_-beep- _

In your room you are not. Suspicious I am. Where you could be I don't know.

_-beep- _

I think there on to us Anakin; Master Yoda stopped by to see if I knew where you where. He looked very surprised that I didn't...

_-beep-_

What's going on Skyguy? Why is everyone singing that song about kissing in a tree but replacing the names with yours and senator Amidalas? I am very confused by all this...I thought Jedi were forbidden to have any attachments!

_-beep- _

Is Master Yoda's theory true? _ARE_ you married to Padme?

_-beep- _

Expose the truth I will. Expelled from the Jedi order you will be young Skywalker!

_-beep-_

I was planning on asking you this later but with the current circumstances I think I'll ask now. Join the dark side! Sith are allowed to have all the attachments they want plus you can use force lightning... If you don't get all your limbs cut off and get burned by lava. You also wouldn't have to worry about that lame prophcy that says you'll bring the force into balence! Anyway please consider Joining the dark side and let me be your new master!

_-beep- _

**A/N: So there it is the first chapter of "Inbox Messages" I would love some feedback. What can I fix, what did you like? And if you want I can do a specific character... Hope yall enjoyed it :)**


	2. Luke Skywalker

**Disclaimer: Again I don't own Star Wars nor (I like that word "nor") am I making any money off of this.**

_You've reached Luke Skywalker aka Hero of the Rebellion, First of the "new" Jedi, or if you're talking to Mara Farmboy or SKYWALKER! I am not able to take your call because I'm either trying to talk Mara into taking Jedi training, training future Jedi, or saving the New Republic from certain doom. I will get back to you as soon as poss- What was that Leia; Chewies stuck in a well? Time to save the day again…_

_-beep- _

I know for a fact that Chewie wasn't stuck in a well. You know kid nobody likes your Lassie jokes!

_-beep-_

You know Luke, happy I used your first name, you don't have to be so modest on this recording, yes that was sarcasm, and how many times do I have to tell you that I don't want to go to your stupid Jedi School!

_-beep-_

Why did you have to use me for your corny Lassie joke? I mean Han would make much more sense! He is always around that walking carpet, as much as love Chewbacca he is still a walking carpet! But that's really not why I called I wanted to know if you could, as you kindly put it, "Save the New Republic from certain doom"? Thanks

_-beep-_

Aaarrrggg

_-beep-_

Chewie realized that you couldn't understand him in the last message, that's one thing you and your Jedi powers can't do! He said that he would never get stuck in a well so stop it with the Lassie jokes!

_-beep-_

Hey Luke its Wedge I'm just letting you know that if you see Wes do not ask him about his new girlfriend because trust me you do not want to know!

_-beep-_

Luke wanna hear about my new girlfriend? I know Wedge probably told you that you don't want to know but trust me it's not as bad it seems!

_-beep-_

How do you spell desperate? W-E-S! Get it; because Wes's new girlfriend could make Jabba the Hutt look desirable!

_-beep-_

Farmboy don't trust you old squadron. Wes's new girlfriend isn't really THAT bad. I mean sure she isn't the prettiest person but she is very nice person. And no I'm not just saying that because Wes paid me to I really mean it!

_-beep-_

I thought I told Mara to not say anything about our agreement. Leave it to Mara to find a loophole.

_-beep-_

Luke will you please tell Wes that just because he has a very unattractive girlfriend that he doesn't have to tease me about not being able to levitate anything! I mean what does his girlfriend have to do with my force capabilities?

_-beep-_

I for one am not calling you about Wes's hideous girlfriend. I was just wondering if you had seen Wedge. He didn't come home last night and, like you, isn't answering!

_-beep-_

Luke have you seen Leia anywhere? She left this morning and hasn't come back since. I hope she's not cheating on me with Wedge because he is MIA too; I'm sure that the fact there both missing is a coincidence but I can still have my worries! Give me a call if you hear from her.

_-beep-_

Sorry Luke I was up all night doing things for the Senate. Please tell my ignorant husband that I would never cheat on him; especially not with Wedge! Better yet I'll send Mara to tell him; it will be more fun to watch anyway.

_-beep-_

Oh Skywalker you should have seen the look on Han's face after what I did to him. It was hilarious!

_-beep-_

Luke why did you let your sister set Mara loose on me? Geez you know a guy for what, well I don't know exactly how long but still it been a while! Anyway you shouldn't have allowed her to do that; you could've been like "Leia don't do that it's not the Jedi way!" You always say that anyway so why couldn't you tell _HER_ that?

_-beep-_

Ok Luke this is getting scary; Wedge _STILL_ hasn't come home…maybe Han was right; maybe he is cheating on me!

_-beep-_

Would you please tell Iella that Wedge is not cheating on him! I just found out that he was on some secret mission for the New Republic; why it was a secret I don't know. Also I think I would have been better at it; I just think they don't like my new girlfriend, obviously nobody does, but they shouldn't hold it against me!

_-beep-_

Hey Luke I'm back. Thanks for letting Iella freak out like that. I mean that's what friends are for right!

_-beep-_

Hey Luke guess who it is? It's the person who the force has left so I just stole someone elses body, but who you loved anyway, but still had the nerve to go off and leave you waiting never to return again!

_-beep-_

Hello Jedi-Master Skywalker I am calling on the benefit of the rest of the empire, well whats left of it, to ask you politely if we could rule the galaxy again. I know this sounds strange but we thought that since you're a Jedi that you'd want to have peace, well this is the only way- what was that? Yes I guess you could destroy us completely but don't tell him that! Wait I just did? Great never mind Master Skywalker; don't ruin us completely. Long Live the Empire!

_-beep-_

**A/N: Well that was Chapter 2! Please review and what not :)**


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